Sunday, November 14, 2010


11 Years Later...

"Did you put the kids to bed? Oh oh ok, you are out with your saheliyaan. I am sorry I will do it when I get home” Arbaaz whispered to his wife on the cell phone.
But not hushed enough because we all heard it.

Atul yelled ”Dude, kya yaar. Are you a man or a mouse? Why are you scared of your wife? You are pathetic”.

Atul- The Macho Man. He never tires of saying how much fitter and stronger he has become ever since he came to Las Vegas where he has been pumping iron, gulping protein shakes, and scoring with ladies left and right (that of course is what he claims).

He continued: And that’s why I never want to get married. Why buy the entire bar when you just want a drink? Look at Arbaaz. His wife is pregnant and looking at his paunch it seems he is carrying the baby. Well at least he is here most of the other married men did not even show up. What’s their problem. Do they think we are going to hit on their wives?”

Abdul whispered “I am sure you would try given half a chance. The fact is that wives distance men from their friends. It’s their way of keeping control. Soon it’s only the wife’s friends and relatives who you call your own.”

Abdul- The philosopher, inveterate smoker and needless to say a bachelor for life. He was stretched out on the carpet, looking at the ceiling and puffing wisps of frustration into the air.

Imran tried to change the subject ”Hey guys we are getting off-topic, do any of you need any electronic gadgets? I can get you anything at 20% discount” This was Imran, the meterosexual of our batch with a sense of fashion his very own. In other words, he was the only person who thought he was fashionable. He claimed to have a resemblance to Salman Khan (it seems his mom told him that) but behind his back we used to call him “Salma Khan” mostly for his sartorial sense.

The center of all attraction this evening was Praveen. Always precise in everything, be it studies or looking for a wife, he had done the whole 'matrimonial' rigmarole—ads on websites, going through hundreds of 'matches', doing 'phone interviews' and then being on the road. From New York to San Francisco he had scoured the land looking for the “one ring” but in vain.

“So I met this girl would you believe she looked just like Bipasha Basu. I asked her “Will you look after my parents?” She said “yes”. I asked her “Do you like Iron Maiden?” She said “yes”. I asked her “Do you want to settle in India”. She said “yes”. Whatever I asked her, she kept on saying “yes”.

Atul asked ”A girl who looks like Bipasha Basu and who says “yes” always. What is your problem?”

“Arre idiot, someone who says all “yes” before marriage is saving up all her “no”s for after the wedding. I am not such a fool.” Praveen said knowingly casting a glance at Arbaaz.

While this was going on, Nishith (also known as Porno) had slipped quietly beside me.

“Eh look here, I need some advice. See you are the only married person I can ask this question. I mean, how do you clearup “those things” with your wife before you get married? ”

Ahhh geez. I knew this was coming sooner or later. Nishith has always been obsessed with the birds, chicks and anything with wings. With an air of lustfulness he continued ”You know me I have always had these desires. But do you know how to, you know, approach this topic in arranged marriage”.

I mumbled some crap about understanding and about the metaphysical aspects of married love that elevates it above the crudity he was alluding to. After all what was he expecting from me— honesty? Heavens no I am married!

Some of my friends had quietly slipped into drunken oblivion- Burhan or Devdas was snoring away on the couch. Ever since college, this man’s other name is romantic tragedy. Every year his heart would get broken and heal and get broken again and we had to sit through his long-winded sob stories which always used to end with “I shall never love again.” Yeah right!

The pleasant buzz of conversation was disturbed by Abdul shouting ”Millions are dying all around the world of wars fuelled by corporations. “India Shining” is a just a political slogan and here you are talking about marriage and girls. Don’t you guys have any other topic of conversation?”

The guilty silence that followed was broken by Atul saying, “No actually we don’t. Tu toh bol hi mat. Tujhe kya lag raha hai that we have changed”. With this one sentence the wind had been taken out of the sails of Abdul and he sat there deflated and sullen for the rest of the evening.

Though I tactfully remained silent, I agreed with Abdul in spirit. Here we are professionals, senior graduate students- mature people who should be discussing well important things. And what were we doing? We were having the same discussions we used to have in first year.

Granted being part of an engineering batch that had no members of the opposite sex may have contributed to our current state- approaching thirty most of us still found women as mysterious as when we were eighteen. Sad but true.Marriage had taken away that mystery for me (or so I like to think) and I felt different.

In fact, we all had changed. During our college lives, we all were fun-loving, risk-taking rulebreakers who thought having girlfriends, fagging & taking weed was fun and never gave a damn about anything. But now we have become so involved with our individual lives that we can no longer relate to each other like we once did. Times change and so do people.


Anonymous said...

frankly speaking i didnt like anything in it.. though my part is lil bit good :P

Anonymous said...

i think it needs a continuation..!!

BomBom said...

nyc!!!! i would surely love to read the continuation....

Anonymous said...

itss nott sooo goodd.......... 1.5 out of 5.

Anonymous said...

well put..i liked much like u guys..and no members of the opposite sex?! u hav two girls in ur class..!

Rafaa Dalvi aka Mr.Charismatic said...

Well even I dint like this post this much.. But I don't think its bad

@nishith & bombom
Well actually I dont want a continuation as I want my readers' mind to run wild and imagine atrangi scenarios :D

I noe I gave hardly gave u any weightage here :P

thnx.. I conveniently fuhgt abt 'em ;)

Anonymous said...

well i think its boring the characters are dull and lifeless............and uve not kicked anyones1 arss.....could hav been offense burhan

siddhi palande said...

thots cum out well ...buh i still say t font color is jarrin ..try n use sum oda color o u mite lose ur readers!!!

Anonymous said...

it ends all of a sudden... write more!!

Rafaa Dalvi aka Mr.Charismatic said...

I don't wanna... I wanted to write a post showin the changes in a person's life life when he grows up & is laddened with responsibility... this reunion idea developed later... so in no way am I gonna change my original idea

Anonymous said...

its good though my philosophical thoughts are taken more towards patriotism bt yt be honest i didnt find it humourous.......abdul....

Anonymous said...

hmm very intriguing...although i don't know the characters personally, it still kept me interested
..n yeah a very nice idea to develop...CHeers @ SankalP!

Rafaa Dalvi aka Mr.Charismatic said...

maine kya humour ki dukaan khol ke rakhi hai kya :P

thnx :)

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